Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in starwind0045's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, May 3rd, 2007
11:48 am	Me and Rae did some mad libs An amusement park is always fun to visit on a hot summer teddy bear. When you get there, you can rent a school and go for a swim. And there are lots of awesome things to eat. You can start off with a hot dog on a/an sinny thing with mustard, relish, and cups on it. Then you can have a buttered ear of gun with a nice fun slice of watermelon and a big bottle of cold captain morgan. When you are full, it's time to go on the roller coaster, which should settle your sun. Other amusement park rides are the Dodge-Em which has little bullets, that you drive and run into other women, and the Merry-Go-Round where you can sit on a big car and try to grab the gold restaurant as you ride past. (Comment on this)
11:44 am	Old Mother Hubbard went to the Rae To get her loveable tent] a bone. When she got there, the world of warcraft was yummy And so her ugly dog had none. Jack and Jill went up the Kevin to fetch a/an box of water. Jack fell down and broke his ball, And Jill came tumbling after. There was a little girl and she had a little curl Right in the middle of her Max. And when she was small, she was very, very far, And when she was bad, she was sexy. There was a fun woman who jumped in a shoe. She had so many swings She didn't know what to do. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 1st, 2007
10:21 am	woot i finally organized something for my family to do. this sunday we are going to NYC to see Spider-man 3. We are also going to walk around the city all day before the viewing as well. its going to be awesome. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 10th, 2007
9:16 am	Again?! Will it ever end? Once again i am an uncle. My oldest brother (42) Stephen had his first baby. Reagan (might be spelled differntly) Marie. I never heard of Reagan being used for a girls name, but, whatever floats your boat.  She came out, got cleaned, looked around the room, yawned as if she were saying "what the hell did i get myself into?" and passed out. Stephen was lightly hitting her with her own hand, and she just gave him a look like, "dad, wtf you doing? i'm tired, go away" I've yet to see her in person, but she looks so cute! And she looks like she is all leg, just like her mom Beth. So, she will probably be six foot something, lol. Its a big deal however, because, its the first son to be having a child. And he's 42, he's old. lol.  Anywho, i'm an uncle again! (9 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, March 25th, 2007
1:15 pm	My feelings Ok, you want to know what? I’m sick and tired of sitting around pretending that everything is ok and hoping everything will get fixed when it wont’ because on one is saying anything. So, let me say how I feel to all of you.   I feel like I have been dumped. Like I have been pushed aside and left to rot. All for what? A fight between my girl friends and Shane’s girlfriend? People, honestly, get over yourselves, people fight, all the time, it nothing to PICK SIDES over. But it seems like everyone has picked the side that leaves me her all alone and depressed and crying.   But, it seems like no one cares. Everyone understands Rae side. And everyone understands Lena’s side. Hell, I understand both of them. I’m not saying one side is better then the other, but, this is a fight between TWO people! They got into a fight, big deal. But, now it seems like everyone has been hanging out together, and neither Rae nor I get phone calls anymore to join on any “group” things.   What I don’t understand, is the treatment, both me and Rae have been receiving from all of you. Why has it gotten to the level that people have to choose whether or not me and Rae can come to prevent drama? Rae owes Lena money, we all got, but why was it dragged out to this level to the point that its awkward for everyone!?   How is it fair now that Wrestlemania is a week away, and EVERYONE there has to suffer because everyone just wants to have fun, but now I’m not going. “Why aren’t you going” you ask? Because. What kind of asshole creep would leave behind his girl friend so he can go? I mean, fine, Lena is mad at her, and it’s her house. That’s fine, Lena, you have the right to say who can and can’t go to her house, I’m not arguing that. But do any of you have any idea how that makes me feel?   Every time I see a wrestling commercial, I want to cry. Because all my friends are going to see it and I can’t.  Ok, I can, but I won’t, I will not do that to Rae. That’s not saying “just come and have fun” that’s like asking me to betray her. So, now, Sunday, I’m not going to be with my friends, or my girl friend, I’ll be home alone. Therefore I’m not on anyone’s side and therefore everyone but ME is happy?   Fair? I think it’s fair that everyone is going out and having fun and leaving me to suffer because two people are fighting. Yea, really fucking fair to me. You know, I’m sorry Rae owes you money Lena. But it’s not like she isn’t trying. You of all people should know how hard it is to get a good job where people don’t suck and the money is good.   And this whole situation is not one person’s fault. Two people had disagreements and still do, that’s it. And then it’s gotten to a level where, mainly two people sit at my house depressed and crying because we are so hurt, and the rest of you, all go out and have fun. I mean, do you all know how upset this makes Rae too? I have to sit here and watch her cry on a daily basis because she feels she is the cause of me losing my friends. And I hate seeing her cry. It makes me feel like someone is stabbing me with a knife in the heart. And Rae is not the cause of me losing my friends if I am losing them. That would be your decisions.   Wow, I’m glad I’m such a good friend that I can be dumped over for $160. I mean, if I had it, I’d pay it, but then again, I’ve already been dumped, so why should I?   I mean, I feel like no one is sticking up for me and/or Rae. Not that I’m saying someone should stick up for us, or hate anyone, because, NO ONE SHOULD HATE ANYONE! It should had been something that two people should had gotten together and fixed together. But instead, we have to give things to Shane to give to someone else. And I hate doing that to him. Shane, me, and no one else should had gotten involved. But whatever, we did.   And the other day, I was going to defend Shane, but then I didn’t, because I feel like I’m no longer his friend. If we were true friends we would not be this way so obviously I feel like I’m not your guys true friend   “how were you going to defend him?” Well, I read Lena’s LJ, and Lena, I wouldn’t like my g/f stripping either. Yea, I’m sure its good money, and if you have been going to the gym so much that your in shape for it, good for you. I wish I had the money and the drive to go to the gym everyday. But even so, that would hurt Shane a lot. I mean, guys would be drooling over you, and then when you become popular, coming up to you in public and talking to you in front of Shane, and you think that wouldn’t hurt him or piss him the fuck off? And guys that go to strip joints are scumbags that don’t take kindly to someone telling them “no.”  And, ok, it’s an “idea” but its an Idea that hurts Shane and therefore pisses me off.   Whatever though, I’m sure you all think I’m trying to cause drama or shit, or trying to make you all pick sides. I’m not, I’m expressing how HURT I am. I’m hurt, that a fight happened between two people, and now I and she suffer the most. And I how I feel that no one cares.   You all get to go out together and have fun. And I get to sit at home depressed feeling I have no friends.   Well, I’m sorry that I’m such an asshole that I’m so easily dropped over money.   And, yea, I know I’m paranoid, but you know what, you all have been hanging out together in groups and having fun WITHOUT me and Rae. So, what I’m saying is kinda true.   I don’t know what I did wrong to deserver this treatment.   Rae and Lena got in a fight. Something that should had stayed between them! And it seems Lena won because all of you can hang out together but then when it comes to me and Rae, we are not even brought up.     If you feel I am your true friend, I expect an apology or your side of the story or something.   And once again, it is not my goal to piss off or hurt any of you. I’m just expressing myself and how hurt I am. I’m not one to keep things bottled inside and wait for matters to resolve themselves. Because while no one is doing or saying anything, I’m suffering. Just thought I’d inform you.     (13 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, March 19th, 2007
1:48 pm	!!! Ok, seriously, am i really that much of a jackass or something? I mean, sorry for being 22 and not as settled as the rest of you. Forgive me, i'm still finding out what i want to do and where i need to be, so forgive me that i'm not up to your par, but you can at least give me respect like family should. wtf, i don't get it. My brother Stephen was here for 5 minutes. And i managed to fuck that up too. I said "it was nice that you came for 6 minutes" and then they were like "well why don't you visit us?" and i said "give me your adress" and my brother gave me the coldest look ever and was like "thats a piss poor excuse for not seeing us" So yea, i'm a fuck up, once again. Maybe they should remember that I tried to make plans with them one time. That i wanted to go into the city and hang out with them one time and then stephen got busy. And i understood but then when i don't see them, its like "wtf billy, you suck." Maybe if you show me some respect i might want to go! this entry disincludes Kevin, Brian, and Richard, cause they don't really bitch at me for that. They bitch at me for smelling or something random. k, i'm done bye. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
1:13 pm	............should i be mad? Today...somethign happened to me that has never happened before. Two ladies knocked on my door with bibles in their hands. They had fliers and wanted me to go to an "important" meeting they are having this weekend. Now, i know Jehova witnesses come to people's doors and shit, but its never happened to me. Listen, i have no problems with your religion, i just have a problem with you pushing it on to other people. Who the hell are you to say your religion is better? FUCK YOU! They are so fucking arogant, really. I'm Catholic, i don't go around pushing it on other people. I know a bunch of people who don't belive in god/religion, hell, one of them i love and is my g/f (love you shane) but seriously! Its so annoying. I now know why people get upset. so, ending statement, i have nothing against them if they are cool, but if you push ur religion on other people...... FUCK YOU!!!!! (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, March 10th, 2007
10:44 am	<b><u><i> ANTENTION CITIZENS OF NEW JERSEY</b></u></i> BUTT SEX! That is all (Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 6th, 2007
9:37 pm	I lost the wii bowling tournament! :-( I got too nervous to play normally :-( (Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 27th, 2007
11:12 am	In Recent News I HATE BEING POOR!  (Comment on this)
Sunday, February 25th, 2007
9:41 am	Distant I feel very distant from all of my friends. Like, i made them mad and they don't want to be around me (which i know is not the case). idk, i just feel like i rarely get calls to hang out really anymore, while everyone else is all parting hard. I guess i kinda caused that for the thing i caused? Well, if thats the case, i'm sorry, i just was trying to do good. And last night, everyone was at shane's house. Now, i had told Sean that i was hanging out with Rae (because typically saturday's are the days we hang out just the two of us) and i'm sure it went down like, "should we call will" and sean told them "nah, he's hanging out with rae" or something of that nature, and shane did ask earlier in the day if i wanted to hang out and do something. I know i'm just paranoid. I know that probably what happened. But even still, i feel very distant.....like i'm, not wanted. (Comment on this)
Friday, February 16th, 2007
10:27 pm	I love how everything was going fucking awesome and then i had to go and fuck up and on a stupid test and now i don't have the job at commerce bank. Yay billy And yea, i know, i'm aware i can get another job, but i literally fell in love with this job. "go get a job at another bank" can't. With my school hours i can't work at another bank, and quite frankly, all other banks suck compared to Commerce...so yea,..........i'm fucking SUPER depressed. Call me tomorrow when i'm done crying my heart out. Current Mood: distressed (3 Comments |Comment on this)
10:43 am	High on life? Me? Life is so <u> perfect</u> right now. I'm doing ok in school, but i know that i can always improve in that. I have the most amazing friends anyone could ever ask for, i have an awesome job that pays me good money to the point where i can pay my car bills, my monthly bills AND still have money for other shit (and whats amazing about that, is i'm part time right now, if i got full time i'd be making something along the lines of like 1,300 a month after taxes) and i have this amazing beatiful girl that loves me....i couldn't ask for more. Well...maybe food, but thats it...i'm really hungry. kthx bye. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, February 15th, 2007
1:52 am	FINALLY! OMG, FINALLY! I am a dork for writing this and being excited, but whateve, i don't care. One of my favorite anime shows has been doing fake filler episode shit for 85-95 weeks. And its been pissing alot of nerds like me off because they were horrible, and the main character, fought like, a huge ass battle before the show went gay and almost sacraficed his life, and the fight was amazing....and then he went and got his ass beat by farmers like he was a joke....wtf? Anywho, it finally ended, and Naruto is finally going to go back to its orignal story....and i'm super excited. now, make fun. (Comment on this)
Saturday, February 3rd, 2007
2:42 pm	I know i am dumb, but Sometimes...i just can't help but feeling that i'm so huge gag. Like, i love all of my friends, and everyone in my life.....just, idk, sometimes i feel like i am just a pawn people keep around so one day they can all like, make fun of me and destroy my life and they all leave me at once....and then i'll be all alone.......to cry and wither all by myself......i don't know why i feel this way ONCE IN A BLUE MOON. But i do. I also once in a blue moon wonder....what the hell do i do thats so great that i get all of these wonderful people surrounding me? I guess that tran of thought makes me wonder the other.... I'm not trying to make anyone upset by any means.......i just, i dunno...i'm not questioning any of you.....i'm just paranoid someteims and i don't know why.... (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, January 18th, 2007
2:43 pm	YAY! <c>the day has finally come! No more "hey, what are you doing? whant to give me a ride?" or "you guys are hanging out? wish i could, but i don't have a car." Those days have finally come to an end, because i have just finally, after 4 months, gotten a car! And not only did i get a car, i got a brand new 2007 Car I got a brand new, silver, 5-speed manual Toyota Yaris. Rae says i'm going to be driving a hotwheels car, but i don't care! cause i have a car finally! yay! <img src="http://www.uncrate.com/men/images/2006/05/toyota-yaris.jpg"> This is a picture of it, but remember, its silver. It was funny, cause the guy was telling me how much payments were going to be and how much the car was total, and then right before i left, he was like "i'm a idiot, i try to be a manager but i'm an idiot" and i was like "why?" and he rung me up, for the  yaris 4 door sedan as opposed to the Lift back which is what i'm getting, so it'll be $1000-2000 cheaper, and i could've easily afforded, the 4 door sedan! lol. I like the lift back better though, it looks like the Xa, but i like the Yaris better, and it gets 40 miles per gallon, and if anything goes wrong, richard can fix it in no time. So yea, i'm fucking happy. P.S. WoW Burning Crusade is the most amazing game i've ever played. It'll be here by the end of this week or early next week, but i finally ahve a car. OMG. Current Mood: excited (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, December 25th, 2006
9:40 pm	Christmas Presents ! Was going to cancel Sprint, and then i saw this for 30 bucks, o it was a win win. k. Traded in my old one for the new one for this one cause it was bothering me, best 50 bucks ive ever spent. I get one every year. and here it is, tada. Brian got me all 3 seasons of smallville, out of no where, be jealous cody =] Kevin got me this out of  no where, bleach <3 Rae and my mother are fucking dorks ! hese are disco pants.. comments? the forsaken are metal, rae surprised me Mario <3.... rae <3333333 I got rae visco for a present.......bestest present ever....oh.... and some clothes. Sean Bousanti got this for me.....BESERKER ! Yo rae is the best girlfriend ever, fo' sheezy. Mom gets this every year and I foget about it and then when i get it im like oh yea that thing various gift cards plus 175 to spend on .... stuff. Rae picks out the best gifts...... she should go christmas shopping for my mom every year. my dad got this for me... but i dont think i want it... so im gunna tradeit in and get some other game. Bestest present ever Lena and dad = 4,00 wii points. Needed a new one desperatly. I got a lot of presents <3 =] (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, December 19th, 2006
11:23 am	Stressed Out I have been so stressed out lately. It sucks. People in fucking Boscov's coming up to me and telling me i don't know how to do my job cause i didn't get them an extra 25 cents off. Wow! go kill yourself. And then the managers are yelling at me for stupid things, like, i have a huge line, and i get yelled at for not being in another department.....can you not see the HUGE line i have? Oh yea, your real tuff, you worked all your life to be a manager or Boscov's! wow, congradulations, your a fucking waste of life, and a waste of time. I'm finally done with holiday shopping, and i'm sure i'm fucking poor as hell now. Ugh. Thankfully my Credit card doesn't charge interest until april. But, i'm most likely getting fired on saturday, being that every time my manager see's me, is always when i just got done doing things and i'm relaxing for a couple of seconds, she see's me then, and therefore, i don't do anything in the store. So yea, back to zero income once again. And this time it might be for a little while too, seeing as after the holiday's it'll be hard as hell to get a job. I mean, i applied to WaWa...thats how desperate i was, and got no phone call...so yea, i'm in deep shit. Cody keeps telling me to join his restaurant (Ruby Tuesdays) but, i've worked in like, 6 restaurants, and all have ended up badly because its not for me, i'm not fast enough. But its hard to get a job that is anything other then a food place. Ugh. My mom got a dog, and that has my entire family in an uproar. I mean, yea, i personally don't think she can take care of the dog 100% like one is supposed to be doing, which means, i just got some more responsiblities that i don't want/need. The dog is fucking cool as hell, and cute, but now i have to take care of another life because i have to take care of my mom because she can't take care of herself so how is she supposed to care for an animal? I suppose i throw everything on my shoulders, which i have never really done. In fact, usually i just let everything slide past me and don't worry about it. Maybe the holiday season is getting to me...for the worse. I still can't believe i have to go to work at 5am on saturday....thats going to be horrible. I'm at the end of zelda, which i have been trying to do so i can play WoW again. Also becuase its amazing. The game throws in so many things that amazes you, which i won't say, being the fact that Shane and Shawn read this and are still at the beginning. 40 Hours, and i'm just at the end. OMG. Other then Zelda, i don't really see anything out that is worth $50. If i was into the whole surgery game, then i'd def say that, but being that i'm not, because i can't stand needle's to begin with, yea, i'll pass. Monkey ball was gay, so, i dunno. I'm not saying i'm losing faith in the Wii, just, most systems start off slugish and then do amazing. I'm looking forward to Smash Bro's. Rae is amazing, its our Tenth month today <3 and i couldn't be happier....well, i'd be happier if she had a pc, so then we can both play WoW, or so when i play WoW she has something to do, then i'd be at my happiest state of mind, lol. Apparently i'm getting alot of presents this Christmas...which to be honest surprises me. Because i wasn't really expecting anything, with the divorce and all. And now with the dog, the entire family is fighting, because most didn't agree, while others did, and it was all of our present to her for christmas, and the ones that disagree refuse to pay...and its pissing me off. yea she is sick and 64 years old, but she has raised alot of kids and dogs in the past...so i don't see the problem, so fuck off. Ugh, all i want to do is sleep for a fucking week. Then i'll be happy. OH, and be out of debt, that would be coool too. K bye. (Comment on this)
Saturday, November 25th, 2006
5:40 am	Realization It has come to my attention that i am horrible at some of the most important things in life. When i'm at work, i don't know, its just, i look and seem miserable. And thats not true, well, at Applebee's it was but, its not true, and i just like, I dunno, don't like it. Now, i'm not saying I have to like something to work there, i'm just saying, I don't really know anything about toys and i'm working in a TOY section. And i just like, felt like i was drifting in the sense that I don't really care. A girl came into work today and bought some christmas presents, and there was a sale so everything she got was alot cheaper, so she was like "Oh, now i can go and get the wii!" and i felt like i fully woke up from the whole drifting thing and started talking to her about the Wii and how great it is and all that. And i could fully awnser all her questions about the system. And, i dunno, it feels like when it comes to work like this, i don't care. My register in toys was over 40 dollars and the other was under 50 dollars. So, they are going to question me and since i'm new, either fire me, or even if they don't, i'm not staying at Boscov's after Christmas so.... I don't know, sometimes i wish i lived in Brian's area. Because i've always dreamed of having a job at nintendo, and if i lived at his place i could get a full time job driving to the stores that sell nintendo shit and update their demo games and boards and all that. I get scared because i know i have alot of talents. I'm a nice person, i can help them and talk to them and care for them and listen to them, and i'm very selfless, and I'm very funny and can make people laugh whether because i'm funny or I do or say something stupid and everyone makes fun of me. And school is doing OK, but its doing OK, because i can't bring myself to do the homework. And, once again, the important things in life, i'm sucky at, like doing good at my job or homework. Sometimes i wish i could become a manager of like, and EB or Babbages or something. Travis had not schooling and is a manager, and one of the best, if not the best i've ever meet. And, i'm not as out going and friendly as he is, but i think i could do almost as good as he. He kind of knows all of TR so it be hard, lol. I don't know? Anyone's opinion? But, i'm pestimistic, so here are the bright things in my life. I have my health I'm getting money I have a Wii I have Rae and she is amazing and i love her so much, and i'll love her more when she gets off her lazy ass and buys me Super Monkey Ball for the Wii. I have all of my friends, and, i really don't understand what i did to deserve such great friends. Umm...I have a wii? And i had pizza today <3 K bye. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, November 5th, 2006
6:00 am	FUCK THE ALLIANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (1 Comment |Comment on this)